The Funnies

Today my niece Hannah and Abbey were playing and Hannah said "Abbey, lets play Jesus and the blind man." Hannah closed her eyes and told Abbey (Who was Jesus) "Jesus, touch my eyes so I can see again." Hannah explained to Abbey how to touch her eye so she could see again.

Abbey told Jaden "You need to eat more food so you can get more chicken on your bones, because you're too skinny."

Abbey and Robby were driving in the car.
Abbey: "Dad why do people on t.v. always say bad words?"
Robby: "I don't know? They do say a lot of bad words."
Abbey:Why does mom say bad words?"
Robby: "What bad words does mom say?"
Abbey: "I can't tell you there bad."
Robby: "Yes you can. I wont be mad."
Abbey: "I don't want to get in trouble."
Robby: You won't. Its ok. You won't get in trouble."
Abbey looked around the car. Up, down and all around and then asked " Where's Jesus"? (Abbey didn't want Jesus to hear her saying those bad words)
The bad word I said was "retard" I know I shouldn't say that. Some guy cut me off while driving and I called him that. oops.

Abbey: "you are cute mom." pause "But you would be more cuter if you did your hair".

Robby had lost his wedding ring months ago. :0( One day I was thinking about it, and I called Robby trying to have him think of where it could be.
Abbey was listening to our conversation. After Robby and I talked, Abbey said "I will use my money and buy dad a new wedding ring."
Me: "oh no honey, it's ok."
Abbey: "You need to get married again so you can have another baby. I want a sister". She thought every time we have a baby we need to get married again.

Abbey came home from preschool excited to tell me about "Grandpa's day". I asked her what "grandpa's day" was.. She said "Grandpa's dig a hole, get inside the hole, then come out and see their shadow and get scared and get back in the hole." I asked "who did this"? She says "some people's grandpa's".